Get it by Sunday August 27th by choosing the expedited option during checkout.
You are an idiot.
Don't get defensive! It's not your fault. For decades your teachers, authority figures and textbooks have been lying to
you. You do not have five senses. Your tongue doesn't have neatly segregated taste-bud zones. You don't know what the
pyramids really looked like. You're even pooping wrong - Jesus, you're a wreck!
But it's going to be okay. Because we're here to help. Packed with more sexy facts than the Encyclopedia Pornographica,
the Cracked De-Textbook will teach you about the true stars of history, why you picture everything from Velociraptors to
Ancient Rome incorrectly, and finally, at long last - how to pop a proper squat. This book was built from the ground up
to systematically seek out, dismantle and destroy the many untruths that years of misguided education have left
festering inside of you, and leave you a smarter person...whether you like it or not. The De-Textbook is a merciless,
brutal learning machine. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or
fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are informed.